In the beginning of Jan, I signed up for 2 opportunities that could lead me two different paths. I had no idea I would be accepted to either. It’s now near to end of May with 2 acceptance letters. Stuck in a fork road that could change the future. My future. Overwhelmed, scared, frustrated, and disappointed in myself. That was all running through my head if you ask. But a decision must be made so with much thought and consideration, I’m choosing to leave. Pushing back my degree acceptance and leaving people to question my decision. My answers for them may not make any sense but for the first time in a really long time, I’m not worrying about what others think. I’m putting myself before their judgement and giving my complete trust on my Father. And truthfully, That’s what makes me happy.

Father, please always look after my love. 

Make sure he eats and rest well.

Make sure he does not stress so much, but to remember to trust in you.

Make sure he continues to grow in love and faith in you. 

Makes sure he prays to you and talks to you. Know your presence.

Make sure he asks for the Holy Spirit every day.

Make sure to remind him how much he’s dearly loved.

I pray.

Dear Heavenly Father,

I finished my Junior year of college today. Are you proud of me? I don’t know exactly what I feel at the moment. My roommate said to enjoy and treat myself up a bit since I had a really tough semester. I on the other hand thinks I shouldn’t. I still have this mindset to still do some insane studying and memorizing. I don’t feel tired at all, God. I don’t know if its because a huge amount of work load has been lifted off my shoulders, or its because I just don’t have much to think about. Looking back today, I have grown so much as a person from the beginning of this school semester. Signing up for 16 units with my job, volunteering work, and church activity seemed like a piece of cake to tackle. But actually tackling it for 5 months was a whole different story. I was exhausted, worn out, stressed, sad, depressed, lonely, lost, frustrated, and lost. I had no idea coming into this past semester that I was going to turn into that. I questioned my identity, my purpose, my goals, my self, my spirituality, and my future. I spiraled my way down mentally, physically, and emotionally. Honestly God, I don’t know how I survived this semester and let alone still be able to write this. There were several times when I wanted to give up and definitely lost my way towards you. Yes, God, you have surely showed me how weak I am without you. However, when I cling on to my faith and remember your endless grace, miracles happen. Miracles like me still being alive, I am still with my kind and loving best friend, Johnathan, the friends who supported and encouraged me, unexpected compliments and reassurance, being able to endure pain and hurt, being able to laugh, the family support and love that I needed, and growing in faith every day. I have learned so much about myself this semester, God. I learned that my heart truly wants to serve those in need. I also learned that I really don’t know the true meaning of love. The love that I’ve always known and pursued was only self-seeking. I have a lot to work on as a person, and I’m still learning each step of the way on how to rightly live and serve you. 

I pray God that I whatever the future holds for me and my beloved ones, the Holy Spirit will continue to guide us towards you and never lose our way towards your footsteps. I am very anxious about Australia. I pray God that I will trust in you and only you. And have faith in you and myself. I hope people there will like me, God.

1. Bi Rite Creamery 

2. Burma Superstar or B Star 

3. Brenda’s French Soul Food 

4. Porchetta sandwich from the Ferry Building Farmers Market (Saturdays only) 

5. Sushi Bistro 

6. Bob’s Donuts 

7. Chairman Bao